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Four Fathers
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"See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us that we should be called
the 'children of God', and such we are...." 1John 3:1 "Fathers, do not brow
beat your children, lest they lose heart, but bring them up in the discipline
and instruction of the Lord." Ephesians 6:4 James Thurber is one of my favorite
humorists. His pen produced hilarity in the form of cartoons as well as essays,
found most often on the pages of the New Yorker in the 1920's through the
1940's All of his cartoons are off-level several bubbles. Some are jewels.
In one a woman is showing a weirdly decorated room to the perusing eye of
a perspective boarder. The caption reads: "I wouldn't rent this room to just
anybody, Mr. Spencer. This is where my husband lost his Mind." In another,
two tuxedoed gentlemen perch nervously at the edge of their seats while a
jolly woman, gown askance, belts out a song at the piano. The caption reads
" I'd fee more comfortable if the husband hadn't gone upstairs to bed." Then
too, he is the author of the famous lines "How can I be overdrawn if I have
all these checks left?" and "If this is a wrong number why did you answer
the phone?" One of my favorites shows a milquetoast of a man looking placidly
at a menacing little boy. The boy is smoking a fat cigar and clutching a
revolver. The caption reads: "Now junior, father would prefer it if you didn't".
Even though this cartoon appeared almost two decades before the "Common Sense
Book of Baby and Child care (1946)", it sure captures the permissive,
value-neutral theories often associated with Dr. Benjamin Spock. Spock's
book, the next best seller behind the Bible for nearly 50 years, was the
text book that raised the Baby-boom generation. His advocating of a light-hand
coincided with a near doubling of work-hours per year by American men. It
has proven, indeed to be a volatile mix, with the social upheaval of the
60's and 70's evidence to that fact. Further evidence offered is the situation
of the children of Boomers. Only one third of them will reach maturity with
both birth parents in the home. Considering the fact that an absentee father
is the most frequent factor shared by incarcerated men, we should not be
surprised that the Dads of the 60's and 70's preceded the skyrocketing crime
rate of the 80's and early 90's. We can see now this problem of the absent
(either physically or emotionally) father reflects in the posture shift our
government has taken since the fatherless generation started coming of age
20 years ago. Ronald Brounstein, in a recent article in US News and World
Report* writes that until about 20 years ago we all lived In a "Nanny State"
- one where government was caregiver provider of entitlements, and liberal
social programs. In 1980 we knew we needed a dad, so we elected one and to
this day we live in a "daddy-state" - one where everything from fat-content,
to the amount of water flushed by a standard toilet is controlled by the
government. We all need a father (sorry Murphy Brown, Dan Quayle was right,
as Candice Bergen recently admitted). The sad reality for most kids today
is that they will not have one around and just as Washington was a lousy
surrogate mother, Washington is a lousy surrogate father. How convenient
then, How blessedly, miraculously, wonderfully convenient that a father waits
for us all. A father whose Book still outsells Dr. Spock's. A father who
is never absent, never abusive, never distant, never otherwise occupied.
We never look at the couch and wonder how much longer his meeting will last.
We never wave good-bye as he leaves for a week long hunting trip with his
buddies and without you. We never have to look at a strangers face and wonder
if he is the one. We never have to stay in our room, or at a friends house
to avoid his violent moods. No He is there, always He cares, always He sees
and hears, always He forgives, always He gives grace always . He accepts
us all, always, insofar as we accept Him (What's not to accept?). Any of
us who are fatherless, are fatherless then by choice. May we earthly fathers
strive to be like Him. May we earthlings all embrace Him as Father. *"When
Daddy is a Nag" by Ronald Brounstein in US News & World Report - Jun
1, 1998, p.30
-Barry Bryson |
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